If you know anything about me (a big presumption on my part, to be certain), you know I transitioned out of the active practice of law to a full-time career of being a lawyer who coaches other lawyers in the areas of peak performance and leadership. Constantly am asked about the “why” of the transition, am challenged as someone who “bailed” on his practice, or left my practice because I either couldn’t hack it (i.e. was burnt out) or was unsuccessful. Even in those situations where those questions and challenges weren’t voiced, my fear is they are playing in the background. I’m writing this post to put the questions and issues to bed once and for all. As the reader, you get to decide whether to believe what follows or not. That decision is out of my control. What is in my control, always, is my story, which I own 100%. It is not “Instagram-perfect,” because, frankly, nothing in life is. It is, however, mine.
Debunking Myths: The Real Reasons Behind My Career Pivot.
The short of it is: I didn’t leave the law because I was burnt out, stressed out, or failing. Instead, I did the work of defining what I wanted my life to look like in, at that time 20 years. After taking that, for for me was a first-in-my-life, step, I was faced with a decision. Would I continue to practice law, a profession I excelled at, was well respected in, and made a damn good living with, or would I pivot to a course which would set me on the road to creating that 20-year vision; a road where my future was uncertain and one on which I could satisfy my core values of service, adventure, and success? The answer is apparent, I pivoted.
If you’re at all interested in the more detailed story of why I pivoted from being a lawyer and law firm leader to a lawyer who coaches lawyers, I invite you to read on.
From Healthcare to Law: The Unconventional Path Driven By My Core Values.
In order for you to understand my “why,” of what I’ll call “the pivot,” it may be important you know I did not grow up dreaming of becoming an attorney. In fact, in high school, I dreamt of becoming a veterinarian. That is until some I’m now certain disavowed aptitude test allegedly informed my high school guidance counselor to unceremoniously inform me I was either not smart enough or driven enough to achieve that dream. (Writing that, something I’ve never connected with the journey which led me to today, is evidence of the power of writing, by the way.) Of course, even if becoming an attorney had been my dream then, I’m all but certain that same test would have lead that same counselor to tell me the same; “don’t bother trying.” But I digress…
My first career was as a respiratory therapist; first as a Certified Respiratory Therapist (CRT) then as a Registered Respiratory Therapist (RRT). Looking at this choice, with the benefit of hindsight, it’s not surprising and is evidence of my core value of service. Why was it not surprising? My mother was a registered nurse. I suppose I have her to thank for the nurture part of my “service” core value. If it wasn’t for what I refer to as my “second” (but, honestly no less important) core value of adventure, I probably would have stayed in New Jersey, settling into a life of routine and comfort. I did not. Instead, after visiting southern California on vacation in August of 1986, I packed up my car on Halloween of that same year, and moved to San Diego. I didn’t have a job, but was certain I would get one as a Respiratory Therapist (uncertified at the time), didn’t have a place to live, and didn’t know a soul, although I talked a friend into moving across the country with me (thanks Derrick!). I not only got a job and an apartment, I met Michelle, a wonderful Registered Nurse, and we were married on September 15, 1990.
One day, after a tough day at the hospital, Michelle and I were eating dinner while our newborn daughter Allie slept in her bassinet, and I said “I want to go to law school.” Although I loved being a healthcare professional, it was taking a toll on me psychologically and emotionally. I was on the road to significant burnout. Becoming an attorney seemed like a natural fit as I’d always been told I could argue with the best of them and I didn’t have any ideas at the time. Michelle looked at me, then around the house we had recently purchased, then at our sleeping daughter, and said something along the lines of “Okay…just don’t screw it up.” (She might have used stronger language than that; in fact, I know she did.)
“Screw it up,” I did not. Prior to law school, for the first time in my life I can remember, I set a concrete goal for my performance, not that I told anyone. My goal was to finish in the top 10% of my graduating class from California Western School of Law. Here’s the thing about goals, especially big ones, they can be motivating and paralyzing. At turns, my goal was those things to me. At the end of law school, I did not achieve my goal of graduating in the top 10%; instead, I was ranked number 5 overall. That’s what lead us to move from San Diego, California, to Boise, Idaho, in 1998. I became a law clerk at the Idaho Court of Appeals. It was a fantastic opportunity to be mentored by Judge Darrel Perry.
My legal career was fulfilling, first as a law clerk, then as a Deputy Attorney General, then as an associate at a mid-sized law firm, then as a partner at the same firm. Beginning in 2004, I began conversations with two wonderful friends, Guy Hallam and Brad Sneed, about starting our own firm. The three of us knew we could “build a better mousetrap” and our law firm would be different than anything that was out there. As you probably know, lawyers are a risk-averse bunch; it took us two years to pull the trigger and open Kormanik Hallam & Sneed LLP.
Building a Law Firm: Lessons in Leadership and Innovation.
During the first year of Kormanik Hallam & Sneed LLP, if I had a dollar for each time I questioned my sanity for wanting to open a firm, wondered whether I was cut out for law firm leadership, or doubted my business acumen, I would have retired long ago. Today, I look back on that period quite fondly, when I was in it…not so much.
I became the de facto managing partner, not through some form of formal process but simply because I was drawn to it and its activities; my partners weren’t. Through the ups and downs of the great recession, the firm not only survived, it thrived. In 2011, based on my persistent encouragement, the partners created a real estate holding company and invested in the purchase of an office building. It was a brilliant strategic move.
A New Chapter: Embracing Coaching to Create a Vision of Impact and Independence.
Fast forward to 2018. I was working with a coach for the first time in my life. Sure, I’d had a few mentors in the past, but this was the first time I’d invested in myself this way. One of the first things my coach had me do was to, in his words, “pick your damn eyes up off the paper, step off the hamster wheel, and define the future you want.” Put more succinctly, he challenged me to create a 20-year vision. I’d never done such a thing before. I didn’t realize I had the ability to take that level of autonomy over my life. He assured me I not only had that ability but it was my moral obligation to do so lest I lead a life which, at the end, was filled with regret for all the things I wished I’d done. I’ll be honest, my first three attempts at my vision were small, safe, and boring. My coach didn’t allow me to get away with that and challenged me to think big, dig deep, and write what I really wanted, not what I thought the world expected me to want. I did so.
The two things that came out of the vision work I did were I wanted to life a future life which was more impactful than the one I was living as a criminal defense attorney, albeit a death penalty qualified one, and to be geographically independent (Boise is a great place, but the world is a big place filled with wonderful people). The work lead me to a second professional pivot; the decision between continuing my legal career or moving on to something else. More work with my coach lead me to identify coaching as that potential next thing. Of course, lawyers are my people and, so, the niche I would fill was, to me, obvious.
It would have been so simple, easy, and comfortable to continue with my law career. Honestly. And, it would have resulted in me settling, putting my desire for greater impact and geographic independence on the back burner. Those would have been a “someday” thought in the back of my mind as I continued perfecting (if there is such a thing) my criminal defense practice.
After building up the courage to have “that” conversation with Michelle again, I let her know what I was thinking. This time her response was quite different from the law school conversation. Here’s why I think it was different: First, I had built a track record of success over the prior 30 years. Second, this pivot was much more intentional than my law school pivot. Finally, because of the intentionality and clear definition of my “why,” I was a much better communicator.
Being an attorney, though, I wanted to do it the “right” way. I wanted to be trained by some of the best coaches in the world, using a framework I believed in, and that would result in me being the best in the world at coaching lawyers. I identified the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC) as the training ground for me. I completed my training in June 2020; wrapped up my legal practice, and settled into the world of full time coaching as soon as the Covid 19 pandemic allowed.
Why Coach Lawyers? Understanding My Unique Viewpoint.
I am a lawyer who coaches lawyers because this profession allows me to fulfill my vision of impact and independence. I am a lawyer who coaches lawyers because they are my people, I relate to their unique challenges and struggles and know I am the best coach for them to team with to create the law practices and lives they want. I am a lawyer who coaches lawyers because I have walked, while not necessarily in their shoes, a path they are generally on and, thus, have unique insight and empathy for them. Finally, I am world class coach for world class attorneys because I know the law is a noble profession, filled with noble people, who have the ability to change the world for their staff, clients, families, and communities.
Conclusion: Living My Core Values Through Coaching.
I pivoted because of my deep need to live up to my core values of service, adventure, and success.
I pivoted because, I want to live as Mohican Chief Aupumt said we ought to live:
When it comes time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so when their time comes, they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song, and die like a hero going home.
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